Bring a Change of You and Me
by hikomokushi
Summary: There was only so much they could take without breaking. RenjixRukia. drabble.


**Title:** Bring a Change of You and Me  
**Fandom/Original:** Bleach  
**Characters:** Rukia, Renji,  
**Pairing:** Rukia/Renji  
**Rating:** PG  
**Word Prompt:** Sheepish  
**Word Count:** 767  
**Summary:** There was only so much they could take without breaking.

**Author Notes:** Written for Renji's birthday (but was not posted due to my laziness.)

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_Something unusual, something strange  
Comes from nothing at all  
But I'm not a miracle  
And you're not a saint  
Just another soldier  
On the road to nowhere  
— __**Damien Rice, "Amie"**__  
_

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He didn't have to be her best friend without knowing she was crying.

Her shoulders heaved just as much as his did, but her sobs were far subtler; merely shivers by most standards. There was no place for tears in Hanging Dog, and as much as he wished he could reach out and seize her, he knew that he would just get an elbow to the gut for his effort.

He focused on his work.

The only sounds he could hear was that of his own beating heart, the shovel hitting the dirt and Rukia's tiny tears.

"That's done." His voice didn't sound the same.

It was probably more tired than he had ever heard it, and that was saying something. Not only was he out of breath, but his voice was hollow and ragged, cracking every once in a while with emotions he wouldn't let loose.

Smooth hands wrapped their way around his waist and he stilled, slamming the spade tip into the dirt far enough that it would stay vertical without his hold. His large, rough hands, rested against the silky skin of her arms and he could practically feel her breath on his back through his shirt.

She kissed his spine, and he stiffened slightly, but it was over in a second. "I can't believe they're all gone."

Rukia let loose another series of small, shiver-sobs and his hands tightened on her arms. "I know," was all he could say, his voice choked with tears that he could only describe as _sniveling_. It was his place to keep her afloat, not the other way around. He was strong for her.

Strong for her, so she didn't have to be.

Her voice was soft. "Kiss me, Renji."

He blinked, and prized her hands from his waist, turning slightly. "You're in pain, Rukia," he whispered, though he was ashamedly sure that with the way his voice quacked it would barely reach her. "You're hurting. . ."

"That's why I need you." She sounded so sure, he almost believed her. "You're the only one I've got left."

"Rukia, I –"

"Just kiss me, Renji!"

"No!" He let go of her arms, and pushed back from her, running a hand across the back of his neck. It was sweaty and _real_ and he couldn't help but wonder if maybe he should just kiss her. The hard light in her purple eyes was enough to make his knees shake. "I won't do that to you. Not now. Not after. . ." He tore off. The death of the last of their friends. His eyes found the now-three grave-markers like they were a death sentence.

His feet fell from beneath him and he hit the ground _hard_. His head banged against the dirt. He hissed, eyes clenched shut as he tried to make his head stop spinning.

Rukia stole her chance and straddled his waist, pushing her open mouth upon his. His eyes shot open and he grabbed her by the biceps and pulled back. Her arms, undaunted, wrapped around his neck, holding her in place.

The heat, the sweat, the tears, _the pain_ and _her_ against him.

He gave in and gripped the back of her head softly, slanting his mouth against her as he slid his tongue past her open lips. She groaned in response as he stroked her with it, before he pulled back and rested his head against her shoulder. She breathed heavily in his ear.

"I shouldn't have done that."

His voice was broken as he clenched his eyes shut.

"Idiot." Rukia's breath feathered his ear as she kissed the lobe, one of her hands playing with a lock of his flaming hair. "I'm not sorry you did; don't be ashamed, I wanted it."

He tried to steady his breathing. "You like raped my mouth, do you know I could press charges?" He tried to sit up, wrapping his left arm around her slim waist and using his right to brace him, but she shifted roughly over his crotch and he flinched slightly.

"You wanted it. Took you long enough to respond; thought I was kissing a mannequin." Rukia grinned against his throat, loving the way his chuckle reverberated in her tiny being. It made her feel _alive_. She would give anything to be wrapped in his arms all night.

He sighed. "I still shouldn't have done it."

She kissed him, hard.

The words whispered between them.

_Don't be ashamed I want you I need you You're the world to me I can't live without you You're my everything Don't leave me Hug me Hold me Kiss me Love me_.

"Happy birthday, Renji."


End file.
